“Things We Don’t Admit About Starting Over”

Starting over in a new country looks adorable on TikTok — fairy lights, flat whites, and “new chapter” captions.In real life, your GPS cries more than you do, and the supermarket feels like an exam you didn’t study for.

Nobody warns you how lonely it gets before it gets better.How the silence after a video call hits harder than homesickness.How you can feel completely invisible while standing in the middle of a packed train.

Your confidence takes shots you didn’t see coming.Simple things — buying a train ticket, calling a doctor, understanding mail — suddenly feel like boss levels in a game you didn’t sign up for.You start wondering if you somehow downloaded the “hard mode” version of adulthood.

You question your identity more than you question Dutch train delays (which says a lot).You’re not sure who you are without your old job, old people, old routines — so you float in this weird in-between where nothing feels fully yours yet.

But then… there’s that quiet moment where you realise you’ve survived every hard day so far.You remember you’ve rebuilt before — after moves, breakups, losses, job shifts, full-blown life plot twists.And something inside whispers, “We’re not done yet.”

And the truth?You’re not doing it alone, even if it feels like that some days.Every expat on your tram, in your WhatsApp groups, in your “quick coffee?” chats is carrying the same soft, tired, determined hope:to belong, to grow, to feel joy again in small things.

You’re allowed to struggle.You’re allowed to be brave and tired at the same time.Just don’t stop — because your future self is already somewhere on a random Tuesday thinking,“I’m so glad we didn’t give up back then.”